Crazy Transition, Busy Year...Empty Suitcase.

2 Timothy 2:15  Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a worker who has no need to be ashamed, rightly handling the word of truth.

It's that time again...normally before now I'm thinking non-stop about the trip.  But, this has been a crazy year that has somewhat left me at times as empty as this suitcase.  So, I'm preparing for the trip by stashing things away in the bottom drawer where I keep all my DR stuff, or I'm realizing how unprepared I am spiritually for this trip this year. 

Gracie graduated from Wingate in May...with a BA in Religious Studies.  She applied and was accepted into Duke Divinity School where she started her studies in August.  It's been a period of growth for her and me.  It's been a reminder from God so often telling me..."I've got this!"  The "I've" isn't me...it's Him.  You see she was going to a city where she knew no one, a larger University than Wingate.  Heck, we didn't even know how to get there.  As of date, I personally have been there about 5 times and I have gone a different way each time AND there's always at least 1 U-turn involved :)

I learned several years back that God's driving the bus...especially the one that guides me to raising, and loving my Gracie.  So...I try to obey and with that...I can add Peace of Mind to the suitcase.

Mid-Summer, my job led me in a new direction.  I was transferred to another department and also transitioned to working at home.  So, I've gone from working as a nurse since getting out of school 30+ years, working with others, to working remotely at home...by  myself.  Just me, the dog, and the cat...and she stays hid all day. 

To say it was an difficult transition...well, that would be an understatement.  While I loved and still love what I'm doing, it took social interaction and very important people in my life away.  So, I sat at home at a desk...doing my job, but felt very much like I was disconnected from a large part of what defined me...in my eyes.  There was a lot of frustration with people saying "I would love to work from home," "lucky you," and various other things...it was me, not them...and I felt like I felt...period.  I do feel  different now...I have adjusted with the help of a lot of encouraging words from my Michael, Gracie, my family and friends.  They were right...all those people...but it took time and mostly it took a lot of prayers.  So, with that I'll add Acceptance to the suitcase, right beside the Peace of Mind.

This time last year, when I was preparing to go to the DR...my step-dad had been gravely ill and we had been told her wouldn't make it through Christmas last year.  He did, and Praise God is still with us...I'm blessed to have 2 sets of parents and they were all 4 able to divide up and attend Gracie and Kayla's (Niece) graduations in May.  So, with the blessings of health of my family for another year....I add Grace to the suitcase.

So...for this day, I've added Peace of Mind, Acceptance, Grace and Mercy to the suitcase.  Tomorrow is another day and as I prepare my heart and mind I'll continue to add to my suitcase. 

“God uses men who are weak and feeble enough to lean on him.” — Hudson Taylor

“God’s work done in God’s way will never lack God’s supplies.”- Hudson Taylor

Reminders for prayers

Here it is April...and I've not blogged since Feb.  Life has sucked me back in....me, but not my heart.  So many reminders around my home...pictures, art, jewelry...and they all kindle an emotion.  But, none like an email some of us received yesterday about Sami.  Do you remember Sami, a brave little Dominican boy, Santa's son that we prayed for on Friday before we left.  Sami is fighting Leukemia and below is the email Jorge sent....He sent it to several people, most of which are the doctors here in the U.S.

THE TRUTH IS THAT THE HOSPITAL AT THE CAPITAL ASKED SANTA IF THERE IS ANY PROGRESS ABOUT THE POSSIBILITY OF DOING SOMETHING FOR HIM IN THE USA.

HE IS NOT DOING TO GOOD THIS WEEK,. THEY TOOK AN OTHER BONE MARROW XAMPLE, THEY SAY THAT IS GETTING WORSE AND WORSE.

SANTA IS VERY DEPRESSED. THEY ARE THINKING MAYBE DOING HIS THIRD CICLE OF CHEMIOTHERAPY , IT SEEMS THAT HE IS HAVING AN RETRO AURICULAR ABSCESS OF HIS RIGHT EAR.

I KNOW ST JUDE HOSPITAL IN THE USA HAS A PROGRAM FOR CHILDRE WITH CANCER I DO NOT KNOW

WELL LET ME HEAR FROM YOU AND  YOU ALL KEEP SAMI IN YOUR PRAYERS PLEASE

HOPING TO HEAR FROM YOU

JORGE

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Please pray for sweet Sami and his family.  I can't imgine what his mom is going through and how she just wants him 'fixed.'  I can't imagine her prayers to God...I can't bear to imagine what mine would be.  Knowing we always should pray for God's will...but also knowing you have to be specific and in this case to beg for sweet Sami's life.  God I pray for Sami and his family that someone can intervene and possibly get him to the U.S. so that there is more resources to help him.  Amen

Tough week!

“The best thing about dreams is that fleeting moment, when you are between asleep and awake, when you don't know the difference between reality and fantasy, when for just that one moment you feel with your entire soul that the dream is reality, and it really happened.”
James Arthur Baldwin

Ecclesiastes 5:3
"For a dream cometh through the multitude of business; and a fool's voice is known by multitude of words."
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Dreams...according to what I've read and know...no one really knows why we have them.  The scripture above from Ecclesiastes may shed a little light...have you read it? Do you find it interesting that those who study dreams suggest that when your body slows down to rest, your mind continues to work. The Bible says that the multitude of business will cause dreams. This could be the multitude of physical and emotional business or it could be the multitude of mental business, but either way it appears that this is what causes us to dream. Though your body settles in rest, your mind can keep right on working and thinking.

Well, I agree with this totally...and my husband would too, by the way.  It's always an interesting couple of weeks after my trips to the Dominican.  I am up during the night, taking off my pajamas, putting on clothes...stacking things on the bed, talking to people.  Yep, all the while, I'm asleep.  Trust me...it's happen so much now, it's not funny to Michael anymore.  he expects it...no, wait...I know he has to dread it!!

So far this week there has been plenty of the above.  You go and go and go for 12 days and then you come home and are thrown back into OUR 'real' world...HEY...where did my peeps go?  There's still work to be done...patient's to pre-op, people waking up from anesthesia...there's still work to be done people...wake up!!

I'm exhausted...I feel like I'm literally working day AND NIGHT!  

I've had a horrible week...that's me being frank and honest.  It's hard to jump back into life as we have it.  Don't mistaken me...I'm blessed...I have a wonderful job, who allows me to be away from my job each year for this joy in my life...a family who allows me to follow my heart...but after seeing simplicity and 'island time'....to come back home and have deadlines, dress codes, time to go, time to leave, time for this...that, I want to scream.  Some of it, which I know IS NOT...seems so trivial this week.  Seems so un-important after where we've been and what we've seen.

But...understand...this is ME talking to ME...snap out of it!!  Remember what you friend said while in the DR...it's our JOB...here and there!  I can't tell you how many times this week, I've had to remind myself of this.  God's mission field is everywhere Paula...not just in the Dominican Republic.  Snap out of it!  There's work to be done....right here at home.  There's people who are in need, who are hurting...who need prayers, who need love and attention...right here in my own back door. 

Colossians 3:23
“Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men.” (NIV)

Yes, this week has been hard...but I've got to allow my joy and actions shine God's light just like I did in the Dominican.  God's not done yet...and neither am I.  I have to act on my word...His word of what I believe.  I have to "walk the talk." 

God, I pray for your help...your help to 'bring me home' emotionally.  Not in such a way that I forget...but that I can continue Your work here by remembering the work there.  People are watching me...they watching to see if I show You here like I say I do there...I pray that I do.  I want to be your disciple...I know I don't have to be perfect, but I do have to be willing...and I am.  Amen

A Part of My Heart Stays Behind

"He renews my strength.  He guides me along right paths, bringing honor to His name."  Psalm 23:3


We all know who the "He" is in this passage....God, Jesus, The Holy Spirit...and through my darkest of days I know HE is always with me.  I shared a quote I think earlier in this day....basically saying that's where we find Him...in those valleys. 

I also find him in Michael...today is my husband, Michael's birthday.  What a birthday present...me home?!!!  Yeah...that's what he says.  He's elated to have me back and misses me so much.  I miss him too but it's different when he's here at home all alone with all my stuff around and our 'normal' life is missing something... me!  So he was eagerly awaiting me at the foot of the escalator last night. 

Knowing Jesus Christ is my strength...there's no doubt that He offers it and richly blesses me with it through Michael.  He's a solid foundation for me...holding me accountable, being my cheerleader from the sidelines, and or being the first to call me out...and yes, there are those times.  Those time when someone so grounded in his faith...offers his insights, his opinion, his interpretation...that helps me to see things in a different light. 

Oh trust me...there are those times that I don't either...those times when I'm so set in my opinion and frame of mind...bull headed, I believe would be an appropriate word here.  But, he loves me...both Michael and Jesus....love me just the same. 

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Today....home from the Dominican....feels weird.  Still fresh enough to smell the smoke in the air in Barahona...suitcases are on the back porch and will be for several days 'airing' out.  There's a distinct smell every where you go...and there is no different.  Laundry is being done...a few souveniers pulled out....but I'm a bit teary today. 

I miss my roomy, Susan...yeah, she's right here in the same town basically with me....but we've been inseperable pretty much for the past 12 days and I miss her. 
I miss the sound of the ocean outside our room...
I miss looking up into the night sky and seeing more stars than I have ever seen in my life...because we're so far out...
I miss the people...how, as you ride down the road in the open red truck...they'll wave as you wave...they're the same as me.
I miss the team...God's team that He so sweetly put together.  I smile as I think about the things we shared this week...each with their own gifts and talents...their niche'

I miss seeing God so simply.....oh, I know He's here....but as I have made it so abdundantly clear throughout my blog....here...He's not as simple sometimes.  I know...I make it that way.

I miss....a part of my heart that always stays behind. 

"I Know What It Is To Have Plenty" Philippians 4:12

"All of us love mountaintop experiences, but it is a trap to always be expecting and looking forward to those times of exhilaration. And if we are truly honest, we will admit we have learned greater lessons from the Lord while in the valleys  of life.  Of course, our understanding of what God was doing typically comes much later.  Kierkegaard, the Danish philosopher, once wrote, 'Life can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forwards.' 

When we compare the mountaintop to the valley, we realize that what sustains us- such as water, food, and fellowship - is found in the valley.  And, the people who so desperately need our testimony of faith live there!"

  

"Morning by Morning"  The Devotions of Charles Spurgeon & Jim  Reimann

I've read this twice today...and it rings with such truth.  It's when I'm at my lowest that I can see Him...feel Him, so why would we think that's now where He is....wanting us to lean, and rely on His wisdom, Grace, and Mercy.

I wonder if maybe that's why the people in these 3rd world countries are so close to Him...they don't have all the distractions but they still rely on us....you and I to offer them and show them their mountaintop experiences.  Regardless of how different it may be from ours.  He's still just as powerful and "there" for them.  I want to talk to God someday and ask him...no, I want to applaude Him in creating us in such ways...we can tolerate the valley's, while experiencing different levels of mountaintops yet still seeing Him.

Blessings

At the End of the Escalator

Again I say to you, if two of you agree on earth about anything they ask, it will be done for them by my Father in heaven. For where two or three are gathered in my name, there am I among them.”—Matthew 18:19-20

Then he brought them out and said, “Sirs, what must I do to be saved?” And they said, “Believe in the Lord Jesus, and you will be saved, you and your household.” And they spoke the word of the Lord to him and to all who were in his house. And he took them the same hour of the night and washed their wounds; and he was baptized at once, he and all his family.

—Acts 16:30-33

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At some point beginning today's journey, or once we arrived in Miami...I had texted Gracie to see if she had already gone back to school at Wingate.  Her reply was "yep."  I'll have to say just for a second...I thought maybe she hadn't and would be there tonight when we arrived at Charlotte Douglas.  But, she kept on with some other conversation and I let the thought go...

Our flight was very late getting in, and I knew she had morning classes so it would have been crazy for her to be there.  I was hoping Tony, Susan's husband was going to be there for her though...and Michael told me when we were in Miami that Tony wasn't coming because he had to work tomorrow.  Flustered me a bit...she's been gone all this time and he couldn't come....love you Bubba and apologize for being flustered...only to find out later that he gave up his seat to come pick up the girls for my Gracie.  I love you Tony...thank you!

As the Charlotte flight came down the escalator into baggage claim, what do I find but Michael standing there as I had anticipated...and also my Gracie.  Her big beautiful smile shining knowing she had pulled one over on her momma.  Pleasantly I might add! 

I know what you may be thinking...who does she hug first?  Well....knowing the other would understand, and I think knowing that he knew who I would hug first...I went to my Gracie.  She had been on my mind and my heart for so much of this trip.  From thinking about her while talking and sharing with Connie.  Thinking of how God is leading her into the ministry and feeling His Presence in her and my life.  Not being able to talk to her on Skype as we had planned and how we both struggled so much with that until we had to give that up to God to control...and He did.  To watching the youth skits at LaHoya's church and realizing what God is doing in her life.  I want her so much to experience this culture, and although she has through me and my pictures, stories over the years...I want her to carry it in her heart.  So, yeah...she was with me in a big way this year and I had to get to her and get/give a hug. 

Michael was given a hug from Susie...so he was covered and then we switched...He understands this love I have for my girl.  He understands this bond that we share, our past, our struggles, and he comfortably understands his role in being our blessing from God that pulled our past pains from a bad marriage into a blessed family household that loves God, and worships Him together. 

I love you both, Michael and Gracie!  I've never asked 'permission' to go on the trip each year...I laugh as I type that.  I guess I'm not an 'ask permission' type person...but I do know your love for me well enough to know that you enable my desires and allow me to follow my heart, my dream, my gifts...so for that I say 'thank you.'

Blessings!

Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives, and do not be harsh with them. Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord. Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.

—Colossians 3:18-21

Fully Equipped for the Journey Home

Suitcases packed with some dirty clothes....some left behind.  Extra tolietries, snacks, or little extras given to Amy to keep.  What few souveniers I purchased are stowed away in the suitcase...my fresh coffee, a small painting from Betty's in Santo Domingo....passport and documents completed and ready to go through security/immigration/customs as we exit the country....heading home.

I'm tired...in a way, I'm dreading this day.  It's a day of anticipation of returning home to family and loved ones...but it's also a return to 'reality.'  We're all so blessed with our lives in the states...no doubt.  But, I for one dread the return to the rat race...the demands of my life.  I only wish I had a few days to savor, if you will, and process the thoughts.  But, our lives await us and what blessed lives we have. 

I feel fully equipped to give it another shot at showing the "God in me" more than I did before I left.  I fall so short of that sometimes...I know...we all do.  But, upon returning you find yourself resenging the 'nothingness' in our lives...the mundane happenings that are non-productive in showing the love of Christ or helping others....
So, for awhile...I'll be good...spot on...aware, equipped.  I pray each year that I can hang on a little bit longer each year so as not to forget the armour for which we were suited with while in Barahona.  The simplicity, the unconditional caring and love....the eyes of Jesus.

Leaving the island of Hispanola

"Equip you with everything good for doing his will, and may he work in us what is pleasing to him, through Jesus Christ, to whom be glory for ever and ever. Amen"  Hebrew 13:21

I Saw Jesus Last Week

***I can't take credit for writing this, but did modify it a bit to suit you...all of you. 
Hopefully it covers you all.  God bless you for showing Jesus through all that you did!**********************************************************************

I Saw Jesus Last Week.
He was wearing blue jeans and an old shirt.
He was at the hospital making repairs;
He was alone and working hard.
For just a minute he looked a little like one of our team members.
But it was Jesus, I could tell by his smile.

I saw Jesus last Sunday.
He was reading scripture in church at LaHoya.
He didn't talk real loud or use long words,
But you could tell He believed what she said.
For just a minute, He looked like one of our team members.
But it was Jesus, I could tell by his loving voice.

I saw Jesus last week.
He was at the hospital providing surgery, and care to the sick.
They prayed together quietly before each case.For just a minute he looked like our surgical team.
But it was Jesus, I could tell by the compassion in his eyes.

I saw Jesus one day.
He was in a room preparing our lunches 
He then fixed us a special lunch to nourish us all.
For just a minute he looked like my friends.
But it was Jesus, I could feel the love from his heart

I saw Jesus last week.
He was praying on around a friend in need...
He then began to cry for those he prayed for and for a special little boy.
For just a minute he looked like our whole team coming together as one.
But it was Jesus, I could see the compassion poured out of his prayer, and the love offering that was given to her. 

I saw Jesus the other day.
He was at the bateys playing with the children.
He then put his arms around them, laughed, took pictures, and blew bubbles.
For just a minute he looked like our mission team members.
But it was Jesus, I could see the laughter & unconditional love in their eyes.

I saw Jesus last week.
He was on a red truck riding through this small town.
He waved a people on the street.
For just a minute he look like a loving people for the mission team.But it was Jesus,
I could see the love that was given in a gesture. 

I see Jesus everywhere,
Preparing beans & rice, counting pills/ prescribing to the sickUnloading and reloading boxes onto buses/trucks,Being friendly to a newcomer
And for just a minute I think he's someone I know
But it's always Jesus, I can tell by the way he serves.

May someone see Jesus in you today. Remember to encourage those you see living for Jesus!

Blessings!!

I've Learned I Will Never Be the Same Again

Before dinner in Santo Domingo Saturday night with our team, Connie, Olivia, Jorge, Amy, and the other COPA girls...I shared this as our last devotion. 
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In the Dominican Republic I learned about excess…mine. 
I learned that I have more…than the whole island we stayed on. 
I learned they had more…than I could possibly ever understand. 
I learned simplicity…is a blessing. 
I learned that from where God is sitting…we all look the same. 
I learned that my skill level…does not matter as much as my desire level. 
I learned I cannot make an economic change in their lives…but they can in mine. 
I learned about love from people…who had only love to give. 
I learned why missionaries do…what missionaries do. 
I learned why beauty is as simple…as a child’s smile. 
I learned candy is just as sweet…in someone else’s mouth. 
I learned that even old men can learn from children…who do not speak the same language. 
I learned I needed my passport validated…with God’s entry stamp. 
I learned food to exist is so much better…than excess food to enjoy. 
I learned why God rested…on the seventh day. 
I learned how arrogant I must be…to think I gave them anything. 
I learned how little some people need…to get by. 
I learned that customs and culture…are part of God’s wisdom. 
I learned that a fellowship of believers feels the same…here and there. 
I learned sleeping in a one room shanty is different than sleeping in a five bedroom house…not worse – but different. 
I learned about sharing…from those who had so little to share. 
I learned how all beaches…are not the same. 
I learned that God so loved the world…that he gave.  
I learned the true meaning of the parable…of the widow’s mite. 
I learned God is fluent…in every language. 
I learned why I need reminding from time to time that I am such a small part…of a bigger picture and God is the painter. 
I learned that a shovel (hammer) does not care…who operates it. 
I learned that poor is not a definition…only an economic condition.  I learned why worship…has no specific time or place. 
I learned why I must never take for granted those things…I take for granted. 
I learned I will never be the same…or normal again.

Submitted by Bob Gourley, Rock Hill UMVIM team to Venezuela.
Adapted for Dominican trip by Paula Lambert 2005/2006/2007/2008,
 2009, 2010, 2011

Travel to Santo Domingo

“There are no foreign lands. It is the traveler only who is foreign.” – Robert Louis Stevenson

“People travel to faraway places to watch, in fascination, the kind of people they ignore at home.” – Dagobert D. Runes

“Once you have traveled, the voyage never ends, but is played out over and over again in the quiestest chambers. The mind can never break off from the journey.” –  Pat Conroy

Trust in the Lord and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture.

Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn,

the justice of your cause like the noonday sun.  Psalm 37:3-6